RB Reflection: 6 July 2007

Chapter 29. Readmission of Brothers Who Leave the Monastery

If a brother, following his own evil ways, leaves the monastery but then wishes to return, he must first promise to make full amends for leaving. Let him be received back, but as a test of his humility he should be given the last place. If he leaves again, or even a third time, he should be readmitted under the same conditions. After this, however, he must understand that he will be denied all prospect of return.

I have been told that in the pre-Vatican II days, if a brother left Gethsemani, he was not allowed to tell anyone he was leaving; he gave back his habit, was given his street clothes, and shown to a room where his suitcase was waiting for him, and that was it. No goodbye, go God bless, just -- go back to the world of the doomed. They stopped doing that nearly forty years ago. In fact, in the 1970s they had a gathering of as many of the brothers who had left as they could find, and said, "We were wrong, and we are sorry."

It's not hard to see, though, where the older attitude came from: "following his own evil ways." However, if we place this chapter as a natural follow up to the previous chapter, where a brother is cast out of the community, then the "following his own evil ways," begins to make sense.

Since the Lay Cistercians of Gethsemani have no such procedures in place, let's think of the various relationships in our lives. When you finally realize that a friendship is toxic, what do you do? How do you handle it? If we take the spirit of the last few chapters and apply it to the relationships in our lives, then we have learned to deal with the "toxic" without the non-christian reaction of simply cutting them off like a dead branch. We learn to give chances for amendment from the other person, but in the end if they will not change how they deal with us, then they must be cut out of our lives.

As the Lay Cistercians grow, both at Gethsemani and internationally, then such structures may be put in place. Are we ready to grow that far?

May God bring us altogether to everlasting life.