RB Reflection: 29 August 2008

Chapter 71. Mutual Obedience

Obedience is a blessing to be shown by all, not only to the abbot but also to one another as brothers, since we know that it is by this way of obedience that we go to God. Therefore, although orders of the abbot or of the priors appointed by him take precedence, and no unofficial order may supersede them, in every other instance younger monks should obey their seniors with all love and concern. Anyone found objecting to this should be reproved.

If a monk is reproved in any way by his abbot or by one of the seniors, even for some very small matter, or if he gets the impression that one of his seniors is angry or disturbed with him, however slightly, he must, then and there without delay, cast himself on the ground at the others feet to make satisfaction, and lie there until the disturbance is calmed by a blessing. Anyone who refuses to do this should be subjected to corporal punishment or, if he is stubborn, should be expelled from the monastery.

In this day it would be overly dramatic to be throwing yourself at the feet of someone you have offended, or even think you have upset. In places where they practice this in the sight of guests it comes off as theater and not humility at all. We do not live in a world where we grovel before higher classes, or even before kings.

There are two lessons here that we shall focus on. First, mutual respect could be put in place of the word obedience without much damage to the spirit of the chapter. In the monastery there is obedience, in the world of a Lay Cistercian of Gethsemani there is not that type of obedience. Mutual respect and caring should be our guide in all our relationships, especially in our relationships within the LCG.

For some people it is not hard to sense when they have offended someone, or hurt their feelings. For others, you have to actually tell them because they haven't got the sensitivity to know. As I said at the start, we don't lay down on the ground anymore, but we can, and should, apologize immediately. If we respect each other, and love each other, as the Rule and Christ tells us to do, then we should immediately seek to set right what we have upset. There is a reverse obligation too, that if you are the offended party, do not withhold your forgiveness. "Anyone who refuses to do this should be subjected to corporal punishment or, if he is stubborn, should be expelled from the monastery." That applies to the one offending, and the one who withholds the blessing of forgiveness.

May God bring us altogether to everlasting life.