The second step of humility is that a man loves not his own will nor takes pleasure in the satisfaction of his desires; rather he shall imitate by his actions that saying of the Lord: I have come not to do my own will, but the will of him who sent me (John 6:38). Similarly we read, "Consent merits punishment; constraint wins a crown."
Today's selection from the rule is very short, but not as short as the reading for tomorrow. We must not let the shortness fool us into thinking it's easily read and done with. I cannot speak for everyone, but I know that I do love my own will, and I do enjoy satisfaction of my desires. That places me in direct opposition to the words of Jesus quoted in the passage. "I have come not to do my own will. . . ."
If by some miracle of grace I am able to realize ahead of time that I am about to do my own will in direct opposition to the will of God, then there is a fifty/fifty chance I might change my mind and do what God wants, instead of what I want. Fifty/fifty is not obedience to the will of God. It is better than the ninety/ten chance that I would do my own will in direct disobedience of God, which is where I started.
The point isn't that I am a bad boy, although I can be, but that we all act in ways that our better selves know is most certainly not the will of God. And when it comes to desires! Oi Vey! I long to do not my own will but the "will of the one who sent me," but I fail at that with alarming regularity. Throughout my life I have dropped one rebellious practice after another, consciously trying to bring myself closer to the will of God. I suspect much the same is true you, the reader.
Today the Lay Encounter in Spain begins. I read the house reports today and have to say, we are the most disorganized bunch of people on the face of the earth, yet one thing stands out very clearly -- we cannot live without the strength we find in the Cistercian charism. Beside that reality, organization is entirely secondary.
As LCG we need to find out why it is that people feel connected to the Abbey of Gethsemani when there is another Abbey nearer to them, by hundreds of miles. There is a deep and profound need buried in that question. What causes a person to drive past one Cistercian Abbey to come to Gethsemani? Why have we grown to such huge numbers? What does this mean for us? What obedience does that call from us?
In light of today's rule we have to remember humility, and to not take too much pride in how our groups have grown to surpass almost all the other groups. That would be our fastest road to hell, if we started thinking that way. No matter what the reason is that causes people to drive nearly a thousand miles and past another Abbey just to come to Gethsemani, we must remember to do the will of the one who sent us, and sent them, as well.
Let us explore that question in greater detail as a body. We must delve deeply into the reasons; the call that is experienced to one particular Abbey over another.
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